Y’all are only interested in who won that creepy Dead Elvis doll. But you’re gonna have to wait until the end to find out. That’s just the way I roll. And don’t you scroll down! That’s cheating.

It’s Sunday. Time for me to brag or blush. But first I have to tell you what happened to me yesterday on my way to my Diamond State Romance Authors meeting.

I’m taking a back road, lots of winding turns. The road straightens out for about two seconds, and my foot gets a little heavy (I was listening to Five Finger Death Punch’s Bad Company). A cop comes around a turn. I glance down. Yeah, I’m speeding. Please don’t stop me. Please don’t stop me.

In my rearview mirror I see him do a three-point turn in the middle of the road and know I’m sunk. Crap!

I’m bending over, reaching into my glove box, when he walks up and knocks on my passenger-side door. I look up into the prettiest blue eyes shaded by a State Trooper’s hat. And he has that jaw—you know the one. Straight at the edge, jutting, with hollows in his cheeks above. His mouth’s a straight line. Super sexy, and I’m starting to blush.

“Ma,am, do you know you were driving 17 miles over she speed limit?”

I squint and wrinkle my nose. “Sounds about right.” (I sound like a freaking genius!)

He pauses, probably to figure out if I’m being a bitch. “Was there a reason you were in such a hurry?”

I usually blurt the truth. But for once I was able to press my lips together to keep from telling him I was listening to Five Finger Death Punch, because I thought maybe he’d think I was cussin’ him in code.

So instead, I say, “Uh, I was listening to Disturbed.” I know, another bonehead answer, but it’s better than the time I told the cop I was “blow-drying my car.”

Anyway, I got another ticket. Third here in Arkansas, but none has made it on my driving record so far. Phew! And I wasn’t mad. I figure I will take the ticket off my taxes as “research”, and besides, he was the finest thing I looked at all day. It was just the price of admission.

Back to the report card…

* Last week, I started work on the next free chapter of Cat Tails. DiDi and Mason are in bed. Again. So you’ll have some nice smutty sex at the start.
* I am at 90% completion of my little novella. Did I mention it’s a MIK?
* I had a long conversation with marketing at one of my publishers, which prompted me into a frenzy of activity to get them information and to galvanize the other authors involved in the project.

And that’s about it, other than the DSRA meeting yesterday, which turned into a late lunch and stretched all the way until 4 PM. Had a great time even if I didn’t get any writing done.

So, back to Bony Elvis. He’s been keeping a smile on my face all week. I hate to let him go. But, I did promise, didn’t I? The winner of Dead Elvis is…(drumroll)…(by random number generator, as always)…Jen B! Jen, congrats and email me!!