UPDATE: The winner is…Shelley Russell!
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Today’s the Hump-Day Contest — because we need an excuse for one, right?
But what can we compete over? How about the best excuse to call it a week on Wednesday and create a really long weekend for yourself? It doesn’t matter if Wednesday is like every other day to you because you don’t have a job, but pretend you’ve got the most awful boss and you’re inventing the lie to end all lies and make yourself legendary to your co-workers!
Yes, that’s it! The winner with the best, most legendary lie will win a $5 Amazon gift card. And hey, if it happens to be true, you’ll have our admiration!
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My child woke up to her cat shredding a bunny rabbit on her bed. The cat tgen drug it through the house on my tan carpet.
Now my other daughter can’t stop throwing up.
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When I woke up I couldn’t remember anything…where I was, what day it was or who I was……I figured if I went back to bed, it’d hell me remember.
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Shelley! That’s a great one! I would buy it. It’s too horrid not to be true. LOL
Beverly! Amnesia is a great excuse!
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One of the feral cats that live in our yard snuck into the house… made a huge mess and peed on my couch… I need time to clean all of it up! Lie?
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Girly problems. Ya know that scene in the exorcist with vomit, yeah that, but with blood. I am feeling faint, and may pass out. A nest of rats may be in my abdomen, scratching to get out. Yeah, I won’t be in until Monday. Also, this will happen at least one time a month from this point on. (lie, though I know for some this is real)
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Well you see, yesterday I had no internet. NONE, AT. All. My phone is part of that service so I couldn’t even call for help yesterday. OMG! Now I have an idea what would happen if an EM pulse should happened. I couldn’t do anything. Play my games. Read my kindle. Listen to Audible. Watch a movie on Prime. I felt like I should light a candle though we did still have electricity. But wow! No internet! I was traumatized! It is going to take me a while to get over it. I may be better next week, but I don’t know. It was terribly traumatic!
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I have decided I need a mental health break because my credit card got stolen, my car broke down, I found something floating in the coffee I bought at Starbucks, my husband is heading home because he has the sh**s, the presentation I was working on is nowhere to be found on my laptop and, honestly, I am just waiting for the next shoe to drop. Me staying away from work is to protect anyone else from catching what I’ve got right now. See you Monday.
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I just HAVE to help the delightful, young man moving in next door.
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thought I was coming down with cold symptoms and was having difficulty sleeping, so drank too much cold medicine and ended up feeling worse and groggy the next day
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Our house has been under siege by Rodents Of Unusual Size, and while setting up the siege catapults, someone accidentally set the backyard aflame, necessitating a visit from Miracle Max as well as the local fire department. They were…not amused…
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Wahaha! Dead bunnies, siege catapults to kill rodents, handsome men… You all did a spectacular job “lying” your way out of work!
The winner of the gift card is…Shelley Russell because that could actually happen in this house!
Great lies, y’all!
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Thank you so much for the gift.