Bestselling Author Delilah Devlin
HomeMeet Delilah
BookshelfBlogExtrasEditorial ServicesContactDelilah's Collections

Archive for the 'Real Life' Category



First Chemo Session Down! And the Gloves…
Tuesday, August 27th, 2024

Some of you have asked me to post about my journey. This first post is long. Sorry about that. But the end will make it worth it, I think…

Yesterday was my first chemo day. I arrived at 8:30 in the morning, and I was the last patient checked out at 3:00 in the afternoon. An hour of it was meeting with the doctor, because he likes to check in with you when you begin and answer any questions you have. He monitored me throughout the day to see how my chemo was going. The techs took my stats. Then I headed down to the treatment room. There were five chairs, all mismatched, all different colors and conditions. This treatment room is only used on Mondays by clinic workers that come from their main hub in Hot Springs to help out their patients in Arkadelphia. So, I could have cushier accommodations if I was willing to make the drive, but this is so convenient I’m grateful. I chose one of the two fully functioning chairs and waited as they put in an IV because my chemo port isn’t yet installed.

The boring part—all the meds!

They started a saline drip then disappeared to bring in a multitude of bags they’d be changing in and out throughout the day. They gave me Benedryl for any allergic reactions, something to reduce stomach acid/reflux, steroids, something else (no clue), and I was feeling pretty good. The Bendryl made me feel sleepy so the first hour and an half I dozed happily in and out. Then came the biggie, a 2.5-hour drip of a cancer med, Taxol. As soon as it hit my arm, it burned. I asked if that was normal, the tech frowned, undid the drip and rinsed it out then reapplied it, just to make sure everything was going into my arm the way it was supposed to. The burn was still there, but not as strong, and it warmed up my arm as it shot through my body. Inside a minute, I felt it at the back of my throat. It was acidy, metallic, and just in general tasted like battery acid. After that, they put in the second cancer med, Carboplatin, for another 30-minute drip, followed at last by Jemperli, a monoclonal antibody/immunotherapy drug.

More interesting part… I guess

When I arrived in my treatment room, there was only one other person there. He looked to be in his 70s and had a long, Duck-Dynasty beard. He was very chatty. Very. He asked me where I was from because I didn’t talk like him. I told him I was an Air Force brat who joined the Army. Since I ended up in Arkadelphia, he thought I must be all right then. He told me all about his cancer journey and how he’d been told he wouldn’t live very many months, but he’s seven years into his treatment, and God cured him. He knew exactly when it happened. The preacher prayed over him, and he felt his light sweep inside him. The following week when he returned for a checkup, the bloodwork showed that the cancer in his bone marrow was completely gone. His treatment was very short. I’m thinking he is on immunotherapy now for maintenance. Before he left, he asked if he could pray over me. Now, I’m not religious, I’m spiritual and I’m open-minded. I told him I would appreciate it. He gave me a prayer that was warm and personal, asked for God or the drugs to cure me like they had him, and I smiled afterward and thanked him. As soon as he left, I could see some others filtering into the room, so I grabbed my headphones.

I am an introvert. A hermit. That one conversation “peopled” me out. I spent the rest of the day listening to music or scrolling through Twitter (I refuse to call it X). Wi-Fi inside that building sucked, so I really regretted not pre-downloading a movie and a book, given how much time I had in that chair. The only exercise I got were short walks to the toilet.

I got bored and hungry and didn’t want my snacks. So, I messaged my daughter around lunchtime, and she drove back into town to bring Wendy’s spicy chicken sandwiches and drinks. We enjoyed spending the time together—and she had made me promise to call her if I needed anything. So, I didn’t feel one bit guilty about it. One nice thing was that we got to witness a patient ringing her bell to symbolize that she had beat her cancer. It turns out, my daughter knows her, and was really happy to witness that. There were lots of smiles and clapping. And wistful sighs.

When my Taxol (the kickass cancer drug) was running through me, I got very, very hot. I noted that the other had blankets on, and I was regretting wearing sweatpants because I was roasting. The tech brought me wet paper towels to cool my face, and I sucked down bottles of water. I was scared to death I wasn’t reacting well to the chemo and that they’d have to rejigger my plan.

An hour later, I heard the tech in the hallway say, “Hey, the thermostat says it’s 81-degrees in here!” When he came back inside, he gave me a lopsided smile. “That wasn’t just you.” Whew.

By the time I was done with the drugs, I was done for the day, or so I thought. My daughter was in the school line, waiting to pick up kids, so I had to wait outside for a few minutes after they locked up the clinic to transfer all their equipment and load up for the trek back to Hot Springs. I’m sure I could have waited inside, but I was eager to be OUT.

Aftermath

I was so happy to be home, sitting in the AC, hearing my noisy family and dogs. I sat for a little while, trying to get motivated to head downstairs to my apartment. I have an office, my living-bed area, and my art room downstairs. I like it there. When I need to work or have some quiet time, I retreat there. I have only my cat and the two bunnies in the art room. They don’t make much noise.

I changed out of my sweats into my nightgown and just laid down to take a nap in my cool sheets when the 15-year-old stuck her head in the door. “Hey, Nina, I don’t want to bother you, but you did say to nag you about the pool…”

I had issued orders that, while it was still warm enough, I wasn’t going to miss a day in the pool, no matter how much I might grouse about fatigue or whatever. I grumbled but told her to give me five. So, five minutes later, I was back upstairs, shuffling outside to the pool, thinking I would only last a few minutes before I’d have to head back to bed because chemo sucked the juice out of me.

An hour later, I reluctantly left the pool and headed to the shower, feeling completely rejuvenated. I didn’t go straight to bed. Instead, I ate Domino’s Pizza with the family talking about their days. Completely normal.

So, Day One wasn’t so bad—just overlong. The key is HEADPHONES. Kill the time with something that interests me, so I don’t count the 30-minute drip bags. I know Wednesday is supposedly hell-day for the nausea and fatigue, but I’m ready for it.

The Picture

Around 10:00 last night, when I was finally ready to sleep, the 15-year-old poked her head in the door again. She asked if she could give me something. I waved her in and sat on the edge of the bed.

She was carrying that bear. I barely remembered it. If you’ve been following me for any length of time, you know that she’s the girl who’s had cancer three times in her leg. Her shin bone had to be replaced with a cadaver bone, and her own marrow was encouraged to grow and fill it. She’s been cancer-free for several years now with some nodules they keep an eye on, but she held onto her cancer bear. She apologized that there are worn spots on its it shoes and fur, because she rubbed the bear whenever she couldn’t sleep when she was scared. She wanted me to have it. Her mom followed her inside the room and went to the bag of goodies the clinic had given me as a welcome gift. One of the gifts were the “fighting pretty” gloves in my cancer’s pretty teal color. She carried the bear and the gloves to my desk, took the picture, and said they were to stay on my desk until I’m cured or in remission.

Sorry this was so long. But I thought I’d share some details for anyone else who might be facing this or know someone who is. Just keeping it real.

Report Card & Open Contests
Sunday, August 25th, 2024

Just a quick note before I bore you with my accomplishments and plans… A few folks out there have generously offered to make me “chemo hats.” I appreciate you more than you know. You asked for my head size, so I took some yarn and wrapped it around the biggest part of my melon, then measured it against a yardstick. It’s 22 inches or 56 cm. If you do make me a hat, you can email me at delilah@delilahdevlin.com to request my mailing address. Thank you.

Report Card

Last week…

  1. The big thing that happened last week, happened on Monday, and kind of put a shadow over the rest of the week. I finally got my cancer diagnosis, and it took a while for that to sink in. The family was sad. I tried not to be sad. I let that shadow sit for a couple of days, then started in with the bald jokes. We have a plan now. Some hope. We’re marching forward, no more tears.
  2. I completed edits for one author.
  3. I set up pre-orders for books I’m republishing that first appeared in anthologies no on has read. One’s a western. The other is a medieval fantasy. Both are sexy as hell. I have my sister working on the covers now.
  4. I pushed the release of Ignition off by a month. I am going to cancel the release of Built Like Mack because, honestly, I don’t know when I’ll be able to write it. Writing takes stamina.
  5. There was no swimming last week. I couldn’t after the incision for the biopsy. Then the family let the pool maintenance slide just a bit (they were a tad distracted with me and the start of school) and we have a touch of algae, so that has to be battled before I can get back into the pool.
  6. My daughter and SIL have been awesome. They bought me a lift chair. You know, one of those recliners that has a motor and helps you up and down out of your seat. I never knew I needed one until the first time I used it. They also moved a bunch of furniture to make room for it.

This next week…

  1. I begin chemo on Monday. I’ve read tons about the side effects. Seems it hits people differently. I expect fatigue and nausea. I hope it passes quickly. For now, I’m blocking out the week of chemo for any heavy work until I figure out how it hits me. I already have my chemo bag packed: blanket, headphones, chargers, snacks, etc. Thanks to everyone for all the suggestions of what I should bring.
  2. I will begin some light editing, meaning not many pages a day, for another author.
  3. Hopefully, I’ll get to swim some this week, if I feel well enough.
  4. I have no big goals for the week, as you can see, other than get through my first treatment. I’ll let you know how I’m doing. Apparently, there are some folks out there who like reading the details (they’ve told me so). And since I can’t stop my fingers from vomiting my life here, you’re going to know all about it.

Open Contests

On the Delilah’s Collections website!

  1. In One Picture: Reina Torres’s “In the Dark” (Contest–Two Winners!) — Last day to enter! Win a FREE book! 2 WINNERS!
  2. In One Picture: Brent Archer’s “Masquerade” (Contest) — Last day to enter! Win an Amazon gift card!
  3. In One Picture: M. Jayne’s “Baby, Take My Hand” (Contest) — Win an Amazon gift card!
  4. In One Picture: Gabbi Grey’s “Thought You Were the One” (Contest) — Win an Amazon gift card!
  5. In One Picture: Elle James’s “Sex, Spies, and Subterfuge” (Contest) — Win an Amazon gift card!

Here, on this site!

  1. Gabbi Black: When Opportunity Knocks (Contest) — This one ends soon! Win an Amazon gift card!
  2. Saturday Puzzle-Contest: Another Power Outage — This one ends soon! Win an Amazon gift card!
  3. Genevive Chamblee: Bookversary — Let’s Celebrate! (Contest) — Win a FREE book!
  4. 10 Things to Bring to Chemo (Contest) — Win an Amazon gift card!
  5. Saturday Puzzle-Contest: Summertime Fun! — Win an Amazon gift card!
10 Things to Bring to Chemo (Contest)
Friday, August 23rd, 2024

UPDATE: The winner is…Tianna Toups!
*~*~*

This is the sky right now (my dd took the picture). The clouds look like a pretty, cottony, baby-blue blanket, although the forecast is for heat and sunny skies today. Thought I’d share since I haven’t seen clouds like that covering the entire sky before. 🙂

Just to catch you up… I start chemo on Monday. I had hoped to get a port installed this week, but it didn’t happen. So, I’ll get my chemo on my arm, which I hope doesn’t interfere too much with me using my hands. I had a call yesterday from the nurse at the cancer center to go over what I should expect to happen during and after my chemo.

  • The drugs they give me to help my body tolerate the treatment.
  • Side effects.
  • How shitty I’ll feel afterward and for how long—basically for 5 or 6 days following treatment.
  • How soon my hair will start falling out—perhaps as soon as 2 weeks.
  • The blood draws I have to have Thursdays before my Monday treatments to see how my white blood cells are doing.
  • Drink tons of water/juice/sprite to keep hydrated because that’s a real concern.
  • It looks like chemo will continue into December, once every three weeks, followed by immunotherapy every 42 days after.

Hopefully, I’ll respond well to everything. She didn’t say it, but you all have said that attitude is everything. I’m ready to kick ass. Thanks to everyone for their suggestions of what to pack for my first chemo treatment on Monday. I’ve settled on…

  1. 🧦 — socks, fuzzy ones
  2. 🛏️ — I couldn’t find a blanket emoji!
  3. 🎧 — my dd ordered me a pair to use with my iPhone
  4. 📱 — my iPhone
  5. 📚 — a paperback book in case the Wi-Fi sucks
  6. 📔 — a notebook with good paper that I can write in or draw/paint
  7. ✏️ — pencil for sketching
  8. 🖊️ — pen for writing (I hate putting thoughts down in something erasable!)
  9. 🎨 — a tiny portable paint palette with a water-brush
  10. 🥙 — food

Maybe I’ll add one of the 11-year-old’s Squishmallows to use as a pillow. For sure, I’m going to wear a superhero T-shirt.

For a chance to win a $5 Amazon gift card, what snacks should I pack?

The sky tonight…
Sunday, August 18th, 2024

I almost skipped posting today. I didn’t feel like doing my weekly summation with the plans for the coming week. I don’t want to think about what’s coming. Tomorrow, I meet with the oncologist. I’ll know more then. I’m hoping he has a plan. I love plans.

I didn’t want to post, but then my SIL shared this picture of the sky he took tonight. It’s so pretty. We have storms rolling in. Some rain, finally. All that purple is dreamy. I’ll smile as I fall asleep tonight thinking about that pretty night sky.

Have a great week, y’all. ~DD

Here goes…
Tuesday, August 13th, 2024

Yesterday was…interesting. I had a very strict diet to follow for the PET scan this morning (they changed the appointment from late afternoon to early morning at the last minute. Yay! I don’t have to starve for long.

There was a rush of phone calls. My sister, Elle James, is coming down to Hot Springs to sit with me while I’m getting my insides all sparkly with radiation. That’ll be nice. Everything so far has been on my daughter. I feel for her.

Then, last night, the 15-year-old came to us, pulled off her shoe, and said, “I think I got stung by something.” She was bitten while she was doing my usual job of cleaning out the pool filters. From the look of the bite, with its tiny twin punctures and purplish swelling, we thought it was a tiny snake bite. Off the emergency room, she goes. She was bitten by a brown recluse. So, she was sent home without treatment to wait to see whether necrosis sets in.  She’s the most chill person in this house, so she shrugs and says, “I can live without a toe.”

Anyway, I’m up early to get my last tiny sip of water before the procedure. While I’m there for all those hours today, I’ll be thinking of this—me in the pool with the other “water baby” of the family.

Monday is my favorite day of the week! (Contest)
Monday, August 12th, 2024

UPDATE: The winner is…Beckie!
*~*~*

I’m one of those people. I love Mondays. Monday, not Sunday, is the start of my work week calendar. It’s always a day filled with optimism. I have a countdown of items on my calendar/To-Do list and strive to accomplish as many of those items as I can during the week.

Some folks hate Mondays. The kids, once school starts, will bemoan every single Monday until the following summer. It’s a given. Even as a school kid, I loved Mondays, though. I always had my notebook cleaned out, fresh paper added, pens and pencils refilled/sharpened. I loved a weekly “fresh start” to make things better.

This week, on Wednesday, the kids will be back in school. It’s going to be hard adjusting to those early morning wakeups again, the scrambling to get the animals taken care of before everyone heads to the car. We’re good organizers, though. We manage to get everything down to a tight routine so there’s time for everything–chickens fed and released from the coop, goats and horse fed, bunnies fed and water replenished. Breakfast out of the way. Girls’ hair prettied up and outfits sparkling. Then there’s the silence when they race to the car for the trip to school. That’s my time to take a deep breath, drink a cup of coffee, and wander over to my computer to begin my day.

This Monday is a bit different. I begin a low-carb diet for the next couple of days before my PET scan tomorrow afternoon/early evening. The 20-year-old has promised me sticky notes all over the kitchen, with messages to prod me into behaving. Things like: “Only meat and veggies on Monday and Tuesday.” “No coffee past 4 P.M. on Monday.” “No food at all past 10 A.M. on Tuesday!” There are too many rules for me to follow on my own to make sure my PET scan is as accurately recorded as it can be, so they (my dd and the 20-year-old) decided to sticky-up the kitchen for me. It’s so funny, actually.

I’m hoping next Monday’s only worry is making sure all the alarms are set to get us out of bed for the morning school scramble. I like the normal hubbub. Tomorrow’s is…unsettling, but we’ll get past it.

So, that’s my bit of oversharing for the day. Let’s get to the contest!

For a chance to win a $5 Amazon gift card, tell me what your favorite day of the week is and why!

Just a flower…
Friday, August 9th, 2024

I posted the next “In One Picture” blog on the Collections website, and then had to open a blank white screen for my blog. I don’t have anything to talk about today. I’ll be doing some editing, maybe take care of some administrivia, resting when my body tells me to, eating when I get hungry. Nothing ambitious for sure.

I wish everyone good health, happiness, and the love of family and friends—I say this as the 10-year-old lets out an enraged scream somewhere upstairs. I can tell a “help, I’m hurt” scream from one of her frustrated, louder screams. I’m ignoring it because mama is up there and can handle it. It’s the last week of summer for the kids. They should be chillin’ and making the most of it. Youth is wasted on the young. LOL

So, here’s a pretty blue flower for you. I looked for a calming image, something I wish I could sniff. The flowers in our yard, other than the evening primroses that bloom at the end of day, are gone for the most part, dried up by the heat. Leaves are raining down like it’s Fall because it’s so hot and dry. The one good thing is the heat is keeping the pool warm. I’ll swim after the sun is behind the trees this evening. By swim, I mean ride a pool noodle as I bob around the pool. Again, no ambition, just chillin’.

Have a lovely day, everyone!