Channeling your inner Miss Piggy on Twitter
An anxious author’s meditation – by CM McCoy

Hello. My name is Colleen, and I’m an anxious author.

By “anxious author,” I mean I live with anxiety, which sometimes scatters my brain with worry and ofttimes devours my very last scrap of moxie. Functioning like a normal human requires wrangling that anxiety into submission, and wrangling that ubiquitous beast into submission requires a special weapon.

My weapon of choice in this matter is meditation, which takes many forms. There’s yoga, prayer, showers, toilet time… (Oh please tell me I’m not the only Earthling who gets their best ideas shortly before a flush. (No really, please tell me!)

Thankfully, there’s writing, which, though far from “drafty,” is far more comfortable and far more schedulable. I love meditation through writing: journals, novels, short stories, blog posts, but my absolute favorite writing meditation is the Twitter story.

Twitter stories are great because they force your gray matter into succinctness. You get 140 characters per “scene” to create a mood and move an anecdotal plot forward. They’re a TON of fun! But they require confident snippets of huge character, à la Miss Piggy.

Today I wanted to share 2 of my favorite Twitter stories, 50% of which are almost 50% true. 🙂

---

CM McCoy Twitter Story #1

---

1) He said: We’re meeting the King and Queen for dinner in Sweden
Me: Really?
Him: Yeah, so try not to do that thing you do with your foot

2) Me: You mean dance?
Him: No the other thing
Me: *blink blink*

3) Him: …the one where your foot jumps in your mouth, and you spit it out with an f-word.
😯

---

CM McCoy Twitter Story #2

---

1) The neighbors won’t talk to me. They think I’m contagious. (I’m not, I’m just a terrible panic-liar)

2) I weigh 99 lbs. When I go to the base gym, the SEALs side-eye me.

3) Please… I can do your “workout”. <– I don’t say this out loud, but I do set my jaw and grab a dumbbell.

4) Fifteen minutes in, I rename their “Man Town” circuit “Man Down”, drop the dumbbell, and crawl away, humbled by their man-strength.

5) Easter morning, I find someone in the next pew to ponytail my hair, b/c these arms haven’t moved since exercise 6 of 10 in “Man Down”

6) As legs also turn to lead, hot church guy notices a limp & offers his hand, but I can’t take it. (see #4)

7) Me? Sore? Pfft…no… Lame excuse follows, and now hot church guy thinks I’m under Ebola quarantine from a trip I didn’t take to Africa.

8) Since we’re in church he thinks I’m serious.

9) I wouldn’t consider this a small town, yet when I pull into driveway, neighbors scatter like cockroaches. They’ve “heard”

---

Author CM McCoy (Colleen) recently interviewed with INSIDE EDITION (airs in Feb or Mar 2017) wherein she discussed writing as a part of healthy living and stress management.

---

Colleen’s Book, EERIE (YA fantasy with romance)

---

EERIE
by CM McCoy
Genre: YA fantasy with romance
Publisher: Simon & Schuster/Omnific

Summary

Featured in PEOPLE Mag & on INSIDE EDITION — Hailey must survive her supernatural classes, avoid the pants-stealing campus poltergeist, & live with a roommate from Hell. At Paranormal University, this much is certain: if her classes don’t kill her, the guy she falls in love with just might.

Hailey Hartley has just enrolled in the world’s premier supernatural university. It’s a school she’s never heard of, located in a town called The Middle of Nowhere, and run by a creature that’s not supposed to exist. But at least she got a scholarship…

Hailey’s dreams have always been, well…vivid. As in monsters from her nightmares follow her into her waking life vivid. When her big sister goes missing, eighteen-year-old Hailey finds only one place offers her answers–a paranormal university in Alaska. There, she studies the science of the supernatural and must learn to live with a roommate from Hell, survive her otherworldly classes, and hope the only creature who can save her from an evil monster doesn’t decide to kill her himself.

★ Watch the EERIE book trailer: https://tinyurl.com/qzszesl

Buy the Book

AMAZON | B&N | iBOOKS | KOBO | BAM | GOOGLE PLAY | WALMART | GOODREADS

Amazon UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Eerie-C-M-McCoy-ebook/dp/B0176M6MA6
Amazon Canada: https://www.amazon.ca/Eerie-C-M-McCoy-ebook/dp/B0176M19RM

About CM McCoy. CM McCoy has one pointed ear, a 70-pound puppy from Hell, and a very active imagination. She’s well aware nobody can say or spell her real name, hence the pen name. You can call her Colleen. She’s the PR manager for Inklings Literary Agency. When she’s not chatting with her imaginary friends, she’s interviewing with PEOPLE Magazine, ABC’s 20/20, the local morning news show, or INSIDE EDITION, where she promotes writing for mental and emotional health. She also mentors pre-published authors through workshops and contests. Though she’s a retired Air Force officer with a BS in both Chemical Engineering and German, she’s far happier writing near misses and awkward kisses. Some of her off-the-wall talents include speaking in 10-codes (which she learned working with Alaska State Troopers), flying helicopters, and Irish dance. Subscribe to Colleen’s Just North of Normal Blog 🙂

Social Media Links:
WEBSITE | BLOG | FACEBOOK | TWITTER | |INSTAGRAM | GOODREADS | AMAZON

Even though I’m a city girl, I often write about cowboys and Texas…maybe because I grew up in South Texas where cowboys and ranching loom large. My cousins had ranches and horses they let me ride whenever I visited them in North Texas. I attended camps that had rodeos, so I performed in those rodeos and went to rodeos frequently. My brother and I had toy guns, holsters, ropes and our brooms were our horses.  When I grew up and married, I married a man who wore Levis and boots and owned guns and land in the Texas Hill Country.  The Texas mythology was as much a part of him as it was of me.

Many of our friends have ranches or grew up on ranches. Two of my neighbors are the heiresses of two huge legendary South Texas ranches. Yesterday I visited a girlfriend out on her ranch, La Mota. Her father once owned a creamery in South Texas that made locally famous butter. He put together a huge ranch (nearly 500,000 acres). But time and downturns in the economy forced the family to scale down. They still have their homestead which was built in a beautiful Texas oak mott.

In South Texas the land is mostly a coastal plain which was part of the sea. Mostly it is just brush country. But every now and again, hundreds of oak trees clump together into a stand of trees we call an oak mott. Many ranchers build their homes in an oak mott to get a relief from the blistering South Texas sun.

Nestled inside gorgeous live oak trees, my friend’s home feels like a bird sanctuary.  Inside, the house is filled with ranching antiques, heavy Spanish or German furniture from the 19^th century. On the eastern side of her home, she has a lovely high-ceilinged screened porch with birdfeeders hanging from its eaves outside. In a distant pastures hundreds of wild turkeys cackled excitedly as they gathered to get ready to roost in the spreading branches of her oaks for the night. In another pasture sandhilled cranes were landing with a similar goal in mind.

In my 8-book series, Texas: Children of Destiny, I try to make South Texas and its larger than life cowboys and their brides come alive for my readers. Passion’s Child (Book 1) is free.

ANN MAJOR, author of Passion’s Child, Destiny’s Child, and Night Child (Books 1, 2 and 3 of TEXAS: CHILDREN OF DESTINY series) and Love With An Imperfect Cowboy (Book 1 Lone Star Dynasty)

www.annmajor.com
Facebook . Twitter . Blog . Newsletter .

I’m excited! Today’s the day! Join us if you can!

I won’t be the only one there today! Here’s the complete list:

SIGNING BELLE FEMME AUTHORS

Brenna Zinn
Dalton Diaz
Desiree Holt
Elle James/Myla Jackson
Samantha Cayto

GUEST SIGNING AUTHORS

Susan Stoker
Anna Alexander
Becca Jameson
Cindy Griffin
Cooper McKenzie
Cynthia D’Alba
Delilah Devlin
Dominique Eastwick
Elizabeth SaFleur
Elle Boon
Frances Stockton
Heather Long
Hildie McQueen
Jennifer Kacey
Kate Richards
Kat Mizera
Landra Graf
Laura Hawks
Laurie Olerich
Lindsay Cross
Lisa Carlisle
Lisa Fox
Lori King
Louisa Bacio
Maria Elena Alonso-Sierra
Megan Mitcham
Nicola Cameron
Rose C. Carole
Sandra Bunino
Sandy Sullivan
Stacey Kennedy
Susan Hayes
Thia Finn
Tiffani Lynn
Victoria Saccenti
V.S. Morgan

I have a confession to make.  I adore peacocks.  I don’t mean just as images for art, I mean the bird itself.  I’ve spent many visits to our local Brookfield Zoo, following their flock of free-roaming peacocks around.  I’m not the only one; the birds are a popular attraction for the zoo.  So much so, that their zookeeper Jamie wrote about the birds here).

How is this relevant to me and my books?

Well, I like to write in many different places.  I use pictures for inspiration, and animals, and people.  And I got to thinking, when we buy our house (which is a project that is about as big as writing a book, isn’t it? Oi) I want to get some peacocks as pets.

That’s where I ran into my first snag.

“They sound like women screaming!” my husband said.

“But they’re pretty!”

“OOOO-oooo-OOHHHH!”

Very funny.

So I enlisted my coauthor, Rachel Wilder, in my quest to find myself a new pet.

“They sound like women screaming!” she told me.

Hmph.

So maybe I’ll content myself with looking for knitting patterns for shawls based on peacock tails (if you like textile arts, search Ravelry for that – you’ll get sucked in, fast).

But what about you, Dear Reader?  What’s one of your guilty pleasures that no one around you “gets”?

*Image used under Creative Commons license.  Accessed 02/18/2017 from the following link: https://pixabay.com/p-90051/?no_redirect

* * * * *

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
– E.E. Cummings

My links: Blog | Books | Website | Facebook | Twitter | Goodreads | Amazon | LinkedIn | Pandora

Knoontime Knitting:  Blog | Twitter | Ravelry
Noon and Wilder links: Blog | Website | Facebook | Twitter

Join my Writers Group, The Writer Zen Garden:  Blog | Website | Forum | FB Group | Twitter | Meetup
Join my Readers Group, Nice Girls Writing Naughty:  Blog | Website | FB Group | Twitter
National Novel Writing Month: NaNoWriMo | ChiWriMo | Blog | FB Group | Twitter

Today, I’m on my way to San Antonio, Texas, for the Wild and Wicked Weekend where authors and readers collide for a fun-filled weekend. And the best part is that I’m going with my sister, Delilah Devlin! I love traveling with her. We laugh, we plot and we share information all the way. And it’s been too long since our last trip together.  And when we get there…let the good times roll!

Over the years, I’ve made lots of friends of authors and readers. It’s fun to see them and catch up. It’s also fun meeting new to me authors and readers. We all share the common bond of loving books. All authors started with their love of reading. We were readers first, so we can relate. I wish you all could be there this weekend. If you are in the area, be sure to stop by on Saturday at the Menger Hotel for the book signing. It’s open to the public.

MONTANA RANGER – Brotherhood Protectors Series #5

Amazon | Nook | Kobo | IBooks | GooglePlay | Print

Former Army Ranger’s first civilian assignment is to protect a spunky physical therapist from an unknown threat at a rehab ranch for disabled veterans

Forced into medical retirement, Army Ranger Alex “Taz” Davila takes a job in the wilds of Montana with the Brotherhood Protectors. First assignment: undercover protection of a pretty physical therapist on a veteran’s rehab ranch.

Living her dream job, Hannah Kendricks helps wounded warriors and abused horses at a rehab ranch for veterans. Finally in a position for a little romance, she suffers a set back when strange accidents nearly get her killed.

Her lagging libido gets a kickstart when a sexy new patient starts following her, always there when she turns around. Before long, she realizes he’s the only thing standing between her and whoever is after her.

Accepting his offer to protect her, Hannah encounters a new problem. She’s attracted to the man! Together they struggle to determine who wants to hurt her and why, while fighting the growing attraction they are helpless to resist.

I have a sister who is less than two years older than me, but we never really had any sibling rivalry. I think it’s because we were so totally different. She was outgoing, I was a quiet homebody. If she liked something in clothing or jewelry, chances were I hated it. So we never borrowed each other’s clothing. She was a night owl, I was a morning person. We actually got along well for sisters and often hung out with one another. We still do.

I also have a younger brother. He’s almost ten years younger than I was. There was never any resentment when he came along, even though I’d been the youngest for almost a decade. My sister and I were thrilled. We had a real live doll to play with. LOL I can remember my sister and I arguing over whose turn it was to take him for a walk in his carriage. Today, my brother and I are great friends. We often have breakfast out on Saturday mornings and hit the thrift stores together.

So although a lot of people talk about sibling rivalry, it’s really something I can’t relate to. I love my siblings. But as much as I love them, I can’t even begin to imagine what it must feel like to be part of a set of twins—the closeness, the connection. But that’s exactly what I’ve done in my Salvation Pack series.

Sage and Reece Gallagher are not only twins, they’re werewolves. Well, they’re half-breed werewolves. (Three-quarter-breeds if you want to get technical.) Reece can shift while his brother can’t. They have no idea why. That’s a huge difference, but it’s never come between them and the bond they share.

Will a woman be the one to come between them? Reece has finally found the woman he wants to mate with—a half-breed living on her own in the city who is being hunted by a killer. What will happen if she decides she can’t live with his pack? And then there is the not so little matter of the killer to deal with…

Wolf in her Soul

She’s ready to run, but so tempted to stay…

Salvation Pack, Book 8

Detective Reece Gallagher is a long way from Salvation, North Carolina. He’s spent a decade in Chicago searching for her—the elusive red-haired woman who haunts his dreams. He knows nothing about her, only that she’s in trouble. After ten fruitless years, he’s ready to give up and go home.

Hannah Burdette is burdened with a secret that won’t allow her to get close to anyone. She’s a half-breed werewolf, targeted by a stalker who wants those of impure blood eliminated.

There’s something different about the arson/murder case Reece and his partner are working on. His heightened senses tell him there’s a werewolf involved. Even more shocking, it’s related to an assault case involving a beautiful redhead in trouble. A scared, wounded woman his wolf wants to protect as his own.

But first Reece must convince her she doesn’t have to be alone anymore. And he’s going to have to talk fast, because the killer has upped the ante—and now they’re both in danger.

Amazon: https://amzn.com/B01MUFGTWR
Samhain Publishing:
https://www.samhainpublishing.com/book/5861/wolf-in-her-soul
Barnes & Noble: https://goo.gl/t50uEp
Kobo: https://www.kobo.com/ca/en/ebook/wolf-in-her-soul

About the Author

N.J. Walters is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author who has always been a voracious reader, and now she spends her days writing novels of her own. Vampires, werewolves, dragons, time-travelers, seductive handymen, and next-door neighbors with smoldering good looks—all vie for her attention. It’s a tough life, but someone’s got to live it.

Visit me at:
Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/N.J.WaltersAuthor
Website: https://www.njwalters.com
Blog: https://www.njwalters.blogspot.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/njwaltersauthor
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/NJWalters
Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/author/njwalters
BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/n-j-walters

Okay, so my hair’s shorter than that now, but you’ll recognize me still, I think. Short, chubby blonde in glasses. Oh wait, there will probably be a ton of us there. How about look for the one who’s constantly smiling? I can’t help myself. I think I was told that smiling was less work than frowning when I was a kid… And I’m lazy like that…

If you can’t make the booksigning, or want something to read to tide you over until the weekend, read on!

Fun with Dick and Jayne

Love mfm menage? Like a little BDSM-lite? Does an uptight cop and a free-spirited woman with a very generous dude already in her life interest you? How about humor? Because you know, sex can be damn funny…

Well then, I may just have the perfect story for you to indulge in on a lazy afternoon…

Seattle cop, Garrett Masters, knows what he’s doing can get him into trouble, but he can’t help himself. Every night as he arrives home, the blonde across the alley gets busy with her boyfriend with the blinds open. He’s spent the past two weeks getting an eyeful and falling deep into lust. But when Garrett sees a man in a black ski mask sneak into his sexy neighbor’s bedroom, he doesn’t know he’ll be the one captured.

Jayne has a nice life with a wonderful lover who sees to her every need, but she’s still drawn to the lonely man across the alley. She’s been sharing her darkest fantasies with him from afar but wants more. When she talks Richard into enacting a dangerous scenario, everything works out as planned. Only Garrett’s not happy about being played. And he’s got reservations, because she already has a lover, and he’s not into threesomes. Now Jayne has to convince him otherwise.

Get your copy here!